I am in full writing mode; seated before my trusty keyboard and bright, white monitor. I am just waiting for inspiration to arrive. Sometimes it is a little slow. At the outset, let me make it perfectly clear that I do not suffer from writer’s block nor do I believe in writer’s block. I think that any difficulty in getting started is due to having too many choices. For example, you may have to choose between writing, watching television or going out. Tough choices, eh? But, if you aspire to be a writer you must be strong, determined and masochistic. Easy!
I have been looking out my study window at the garden. Normally this is enough to start the ball rolling. But, not today. I switched to Plan B but found there was nothing to watch on the box and to my great horror there will be no ‘Game of Thrones’ for two weeks. Tyrion could be dead by then! Plan C has been considered but for the moment I am not sure it would be a good idea. Plan C involves reading other books to find ideas or simply to be ‘jump-started’ like an old car. The trouble with Plan C is that I end up getting lost in one of my favourite books. Maybe a coffee break will help?
Now I am standing in the kitchen listening to the couple next door having a shouting match. This is not being nosey because half the street can probably hear them as well. As the kettle starts to boil the number of f-words, c-words, shits, bastards, bitches and get stuffeds reaches an all-time high. I am laughing. Why is it that other peoples’ fights are mostly so amusing? Oh, this is good. She is storming about in a bare midriff top, micro shorts and sheepskin boots. At another time her outfit might be described as fetching. He has decided to jump in his classic coupe and is revving the engine loudly. Sounds good. Now he puts his foot down and takes off up the street, fishtailing as his tyres screech like souls in torment. He is gone. The silence is deafening. Nothing to see here folks! You can just imagine the cops trying to usher away a crowd of onlookers.
Oh well, back to the salt mines. When I am working my study is always the salt mines not withstanding the nice carpet and lovely view. Come on, go with me on this. You know we writers have to feel like victims. The trouble with this room is that the bookshelves are full of distractions. I have several scale model cars including James Bond’s Aston Martin DB5 from ‘Goldfinger’. There are also many ceramic cats, numerous dragons, small statues, a water feature, an incense burner, my teddy bear, my crystal collection and too many books to count. It is fair to say that I have a lot of toys.
Okay, I am starting to get a little angry with myself for rabbiting on and not writing anything. Perhaps some more coffee? No, they might start fighting again. I could not live with the guilt. Hmmm, here’s my notebook where I write down ideas and observations as I wander about during the day. Could be something great hiding in here? Nuh. Well that was five minutes badly spent. Drumming my fingers now as I look at the clock. Two hours have passed and there is nothing to show for it. My screen is empty; the proverbial polar bear in a snowstorm picture. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Shuffle, shuffle. Shuffle, shuffle. You have to imagine this bit, I am frantically rummaging through my scrap paper bin. Shuffle, shuffle. Eureka! Thank goodness for oversight and scrap paper. One line; ‘space travel at high speed is just like conventional air travel, only much faster…’
I am up and running.